I spent a week trying to out-bless my husband, and it turned out to be the Best. Week.Ever. I truly discovered the benefits of blessing your spouse!
Working at an elementary school has its perks. I had a full week off work after writing a post about how my husband always blesses me. So, I decided to put my words into action in a big way. You can read the post here.
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Since I was going to go all in, I decided to post some stuff on Instagram and get help from my friends. It all started with food storage containers. I thought about how happy it would make him, and it actually made me giddy. (on a side note… it made it easier for me to find the lids that go with the containers. Way less yelling and whining is happening now. It was a win-win)
Going all in to bless my spouse
And then I went ALL IN!
Bringing lunch to bless my spouse
Bringing him a soda was my original plan (This has been our main way of blessing each other lately for some reason… There is just something about an ice-cold fountain drink on a difficult day). Then I realized that he hadn’t eaten, so I decided to go to Jimmy Johns to pick up lunch for him. They are “Freaky Fast,” you know. He loves the oil and vinegar, so I asked them to make it extra saucy. I delivered it to his work and was excited to see him.
When I arrived, I posted a video on instagram saying that I was out of ideas. He saw me in the parking lot and asked me to come inside and eat with him (since he is always blessing me and knows that quality time is my predominant love language.) I loved having this quality time with him. It is my main love language.
Leaving a note to bless my spouse
When I left, I put a note for him under his windshield wiper. It was snowing, so I put it in a zip lock bag. You guys… I am so fancy! It was a high-class ziplock bag. Here is the Instagram video… where I realized that I was already out of ideas.
Making his favorite cookies
Thanks to the suggestion of a friend, I decided to bake him cookies, save him some of the dough, and clean up after myself. (Usually when I bake, I destroy the kitchen and he helps me clean it up… that is how lucky I am) He loves cookie dough. One year for his birthday, I made chocolate chip cookie dough and stuck a candle in it instead of a cake!
He got home from work that day and thanked me for the note and wondered how I was able to do it without him noticing. (It’s because I’m super sneaky… that’s how)
Throughout the week I did many other things to bless him
The best salsa in the world can be found at a restaurant by us. I discovered that they also sell their mole… score! I purchased chips, salsa, and mole. He was delighted to see it when he arrived home from work.
The next day I recreated our favorite dish from Red Iguana and it was AMAZING. My son said it was the best thing he has ever tasted. That was a win for sure!
He didn’t realize that it was supposed to be a week about him (since I never told him what I was doing) and kept blessing me. On Saturday, he got up before me and made me coffee. He always outblesses me… even when he doesn’t know that I am competing with him to bless him more!
Throughout the week, I got up extra early and made him coffee, played card games with him, made his favorite pie (the one I don’t like), washed and vacuumed his car, left a note and chocolate kisses on his seat, and wrote in our love journal. It was seriously the most fun I have had in a long time. I also discovered that there are benefits to blessing your spouse.
First benefit of blessing your spouse: It blesses your spouse!
My husband really was blessed. He was so appreciative of all of the things I was doing, and I could tell that it really made him feel loved. For years I have been overwhelmed with work and could think of nothing but how to survive. He was blessing me that whole time, but sadly much of it went unnoticed. In fact, I often complained that he wasn’t doing enough. What a jerk I was! I loved being able to focus on him and let him know how much he is appreciated.
Second benefit of blessing your spouse: You will be blessed.
You will be blessed if you bless your spouse. I don’t mean this in the sense that your spouse will absolutely reciprocate and try to “out-bless” you in return, although that could happen. Even if they don’t do anything for you in return, blessing others feels good. Personally, bringing joy to the ones I love is the thing that makes me the happiest.
This Healthline article explains how volunteering and giving to others has long term health benefits. I found that blessing my husband gave me the same feelings that the study described. The more I did things to make him happy, the more I wanted to do. I didn’t feel as much stress, and I was generally happy all week.
It felt wonderful to make him smile every day and to go out of my way to do special things for him. Truly, it was the most fun I have had in a long time. Seeing him light up at every blessing filled me with joy.
Third benefit of blessing your spouse: Others are encouraged by it.
One benefit that I didn’t anticipate was how much other people were encouraged by it. I got so much feedback from people who were happy to see me publicly blessing my husband instead of complaining about him. I hadn’t really thought about that, but I sometimes think that we put our spouses down trying to be funny. That is mostly what I see online, as well. I’m glad that I could show another side.
I also saw people start to do things for their own significant others and go out of their way to be a blessing. You guys… I’m convinced that if we all focus on this (on blessing others instead of doing everything we can to make ourselves happy), the world would be a much better place. This is what I want to see always!
There is nothing wrong with self-care, as it is easy to spend so much time doing things for others that we neglect ourselves. Consequently, eating only fishy crackers and not sleeping was my reality when I had young kids. That was not healthy, however, I do find that once my physical and spiritual needs are met, taking the focus off of myself usually does me a lot of good.
Fourth benefit of blessing your spouse: It’s a great example to your children
My kids noticed and decided to bless each other
This part right here is the kicker… My 12 year old asked me, “Why are you doing so many nice things for Dad?”
I explained to him that Dad always does nice things for me, and I want to show him how much I love him by blessing him all week long. He said, “I bet Dad loves it. Can I do it for my brother?”
You guys… this is amazing. This kid complains about and fights with his brother all day long! He decided to make a list of things to do the following week, and I want to cry. I love this so much! They both took the Love Languages quiz for teens, and he thought of things that went with his brother’s top love languages.
I initially did the “week of blessing my hubby” because I had a week off and appreciate all that he does for me. It turned into so much more. I had a wonderful week where I felt full of love, others were encouraged, and my kids now want to serve others. I couldn’t ask for much more than that!
I’d encourage everyone to take a week and bless the socks off of someone they love. Also… I have continued to find ways to bless my husband, but I am no longer sharing it on my Instagram. If you have any great ideas, leave a comment, and I’d love to try.
Are you in the life stage with young kids where this feels impossible? Read this post instead. >>> How to Prioritize Your Marriage With Young Kids.